Fresh Start

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2019

As 2018 draws to a close, thank you from the bottom of my heart for sticking with me and being part of my life.

May 2019 bring you peace and joy.  At the stroke of midnight, you will have 365 days to write your story.  Every choice we make determines the destination we land at.

Love others, forgive often, admit mistakes, don’t be too hard on yourself. Show yourself grace in difficult moments.

Jesus Loves You~always.  Jesus can turn any mess into a message and any test into a testimony! #HopeAlwaysHaveFaith

Blessings~Carlene

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Faith Can Move Mountains

I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.”

John 16:33 NLT

person on a bridge near a lake
Photo by Simon Migaj on Pexels.com

 

I read the above verse, and I am reminded that I have the  Holy Spirit with me. He dwells within me and I know that without Him, I wouldn’t have made it this far.  Each approaching new year, there are always goals/visions/hopes/dreams we each have. Some people make New Year’s Resolutions, others choose to make lifestyle changes, dietary changes, relationship changes, and some choose to just look at it as another day and keep putting one foot in front of the other.

I look back over the past 12 months and I have seen a lot of hard behaviors to cope with, on a daily basis. Keeping the peace of Jesus in my heart and alive in my life has been nothing short of a miracle; many days I wept inwardly, wondering where that Peace was. How had I went from being able to handle almost anything that required coping skills, to being in constant prayer and conversation with my Maker because I felt I was losing my grasp on His Peace. What had gone so awry that I felt lost and alone, in a room full of people? And then I realized that I was relying too much on my own strength and not relying on His.

In our home, we have many medical diagnoses. Four of us live here, soon to be five give or take 6-7 weeks if our soon to be (second) granddaughter waits until her due date to make her arrival.  I personally deal with fibromyalgia, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, sleep apnea, degenerative disc disease in my lumbar spine with facetous arthritis, osteoarthritis in my hip/knee joints, carpal tunnel syndrome, thyroid disorder, high blood pressure. Plus I live with people who suffer from depression/anxiety/heart/stroke/language disorders, autism, adhd, sensory processing disorder, epilepsy, and mental illness.

Keeping track of medical appointments, therapy schedules, labs that need to be completed in a timely manner and pregnancy-related appointments, just about makes my head spin; dealing with IEP’s and developmental delays….the list goes on.  If only one of us is having a rough day, we can manage pretty good; if all of us are having an off day, it’s a true struggle.

It’s remembering that I was not created to do things in my own strength.  I have heard, as I am sure you have too, that God will not give you any more than you can handle and there have been days I have questioned that statement. But the Truth is, God doesn’t expect us to handle anything on our own, but to turn to Him and rely on Him.

And while in the midst of my cries to the Father, seeking guidance on how to proceed with this life He allows me to live, waiting on His answer is always the hardest part for me. In the past two years, since retiring early due to disability, I thought for sure I knew the path He would take me, but it has been such an amazing and frustrating journey, that He only gives me glimpses of what He has called me to do. Just enough to take that next step of faith. I can only imagine that if I were to see the entire picture of the plan He has for my life, it would be so all-consuming, overwhelming that I might crumble at the thought of it.

In His infinite wisdom, He knows what is best for each of us. He provides for every need. It may not be the provision we envisioned, or even hoped for, but He always gives us just the right words, at just the right moment. And yes, He answers prayers. Some days it’s “Yes, my child.” “No, not now.” or “Wait, it’s not time for you to know yet.” In His perfect timing. I have learned not to pray for patience because patience always requires testing of some kind; so I pray for peace to get through those times.

Every single solitary thing we go through in life refines us into the people God created us to be. Some are very exciting and mind-blowing, others are so sad and sorrowful, we want to skip that process, but every single second of our lives, He is working in us and for us. And the grass always seems greener on the other side of the fence.

I love my family more than my own life. I don’t like when we are nipping at one another, or being grumpier than normal, because it tears me up inside. I guess though, that since we are human, that is bound to happen from time to time.

I’ve been in my own world for weeks now. A close dear friend is fighting the battle of her life with a cancer diagnosis and no definitive results yet on exactly the type of or the best type of treatment for her. And when I think of all she has been through, what her family is going through daily, I give thanks because my problems don’t seem so out of control as they feel. The strength and courage that she has shown, in living out her faith and trusting in the Lord brings joy to my heart and encourages me to look for every single blessing I have or blessings I have overlooked.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 New Living Translation (NLT)
16 Always be joyful. 17 Never stop praying. 18 Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.

Whatever mountain you are facing in your lives today, please know there is a Savior that would love to hear from you. He is always available. He is always listening.

Jesus can turn any mess into a message of hope and any test into a testimony.

May you know how much Jesus Loves You~right here-right now!

#HopeAlwaysHaveFaith

Blessings until next time~Carlene

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Catherine the Great

Proverbs 31:11-31 English Standard Version (ESV)
11 The heart of her husband trusts in her,
and he will have no lack of gain.
12 She does him good, and not harm,
all the days of her life.
13 She seeks wool and flax,
and works with willing hands.
14 She is like the ships of the merchant;
she brings her food from afar.
15 She rises while it is yet night
and provides food for her household
and portions for her maidens.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
17 She dresses herself[a] with strength
and makes her arms strong.
18 She perceives that her merchandise is profitable.
Her lamp does not go out at night.
19 She puts her hands to the distaff,
and her hands hold the spindle.
20 She opens her hand to the poor
and reaches out her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid of snow for her household,
for all her household are clothed in scarlet.[b]
22 She makes bed coverings for herself;
her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the gates
when he sits among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them;
she delivers sashes to the merchant.
25 Strength and dignity are her clothing,
and she laughs at the time to come.
26 She opens her mouth with wisdom,
and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
27 She looks well to the ways of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “Many women have done excellently,
but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain,
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
31 Give her of the fruit of her hands,
and let her works praise her in the gates

She is beautiful inside and out.

She is loving and caring.

She is kind and compassionate.

She is fiercely protective of those she loves and cares about.

She is full of passion for what she believes in and always stands up for her beliefs.

She is strong and does not easily back down.

She is determined and does not quit, that is not an option and she will find her way around any obstacle in her path.

She is an artist with a flair for repurposing items that people see no value in. She brings old things back to life.

She is a great listener and works toward a solution, rather than complain about a problem.

She is an amazing mom of three college graduates who are changing the world around them.

She is a wife, a mom,  an aunt, a sister, and a daughter.

She is an emergency 911 dispatcher who works more hours than should be humanly possible. The first voice you might hear, full of calm and reserve as she manages 500 things at once.

She is a former school bus driver that loved her riders as if they were her own children.

She is an animal lover and considers them family, not just pets.

She never has enough time to take care of herself, she is always caring for others and burning the candle at both ends.

She is wise beyond her years and has seen many things most people will never have to see.

She is faithful and will celebrate 29 years of marriage this month to her loving husband.

She was a cheerleading mom and advisor when her daughter was school age.

She loves her community and has a great tribe that she holds dear and close to her heart.

But one of the best things she is…..she is my sister. And I love her with all my heart and soul. Today is her birthday. I don’t see her as often as I would like, but I hope she knows how very proud I am of her, her accomplishments, which are too many to mention. I know she is always a phone call away. Our family is very blessed indeed!

Cathy

Catherine, I love you sis and I pray that today your birthday will be all you hope for and more! You deserve it! Much love~Carlene

 

May you know how much Jesus Loves You-right in this moment-right where you are! Jesus can turn any mess into a message of hope. #HopeAlwaysHaveFaith

Blessings to all!

 

 

 

 

I Often Wonder……

Isaiah 44:3 New Living Translation (NLT) 3 For I will pour out water to quench your thirst and to irrigate your parched fields. And I will pour out my Spirit on your descendants, and my blessing on your children.

I often wonder if the answers will ever come. I often wonder what goes on in your mind that keeps certain things just out of your grasp and I often wonder what you see that makes you gaze off in the distance as if something has caught your attention that only you can see.

I wonder why music makes you happy, but instruments playing cause you to cover your ears and bury your head.

I wonder what happens when everything becomes too much and what is the one trigger that sends you into a meltdown. Is it something I can control or remove from your environment or is there any rhyme or reason as to why it happens at all?

I wonder why spinning around and around brings you the most amazing release and joy, but makes me swoon almost to the point of collapse.

I wonder what it was like at the beginning of your life when you couldn’t communicate, did you think we didn’t care? I hope not.

I wonder what it feels like in your head; do you hear everything in the same tone? Do you hear all the noises at once, because I know that processing information for people diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder, many have a difficult time processing information or input you hear and you may need more time than most people to answer questions or respond appropriately.

I wonder what is happening within you when you run and jump and slam toys and objects into the floor; when you throw things without thought as to what can happen. Someone may be hurt or something may become broken, but all you seem to know is you have to throw it, you need to do it to make you feel better.

I wonder what happens when everything becomes too much, and you cry and whimper, because they are no words to describe or explain the overwhelming feelings you have and sometimes no amount of hugs or deep pressure helps you feel better, only crying yourself to sleep helps.

I wonder what happens to you and how your brain is affected when you have a seizure. Will those seizures change who you are? Will they affect your thinking processes? No one seems to have an answer.

I wonder why vacuums and ceiling fans are your obsession. I can’t begin to understand, but I know they are. I have heard this is normal for people with autism, just like when you line things up. You can be so rigid with that, but you love the chaos of toys strewn everywhere and it drives me crazy.

I wonder if you will ever understand the danger of running into the street or running toward water without one of us with you.

I wonder if you ever get tired of me asking you to repeat the same word you just said and if you understand I am only trying to help you communicate more clearly.

I wonder if you know who Jesus is. I wonder if you like going to church because you get to spend time with other children, your age and learn about Jesus, or if you just like getting out of the house and have some freedom.

I wonder why you bang your head, and even though it hurts, you do it again and again.

I wonder if you will ever to be able to read on your own. Or if you will always rely on pictures to understand.

I wonder if you will ever be able to live on your own, or if you will always need the support of family.

I wonder why you have night terrors. I wonder what causes them and why you must experience them because you already deal with so much and you are only four years old.

I wonder if you will ever be able to be outside without wearing a safety harness as we go shopping or to appointments. I wonder if you know we only do that so you can have a little bit of freedom, but we can keep you safe.

I wonder if you will ever take your Epilepsy and ADHD medications independently or if we will always have to hide them inside your liquids and foods. I wonder if you will always have to take medications to keep your brain from misfiring and your hyperactivity under some sort of control.

And while I wonder all of these things, there are many ways that you amaze me every single day.Tyson Vacuum image

I am amazed at how much your ability to communicate has improved over the last couple of years and how you work over and over to learn new sounds and words.

I am amazed that when you started preschool last year, you were considered nonverbal and only had 24 words under your belt, but by the end of the school year, you were speaking in 5 Word utterances.

I am amazed that you love with such a huge heart and tell me every day, without prompting, that you “wuv” me.

I am amazed that at times, you can sit still and remain calm, if even for five minutes. That’s a huge success.

I am amazed that if we show you pictures marked on a calendar you understand how many days you have to wait for something to happen.

I am amazed that you know how to use the potty when you want. It isn’t every day, but someday it will be.

I am amazed that you go to Speech Therapy every week and you improve on what you learned the week before. And this is part of our routine. Every week for two years.

I am amazed that you try to write the first two letters of your name but recognize all of them.

I am amazed that you know how to count from 1-10 on your own and are learning how to go onto 20.

I am amazed that you can recite the alphabet and can also recognize letters, even if they are not in any particular order.

I am amazed that you know what it means to put things in a sequence and you do it without error.

I am amazed that you love foods that are good for you. Tomatoes, cucumbers, strawberries, watermelon, bananas, apples, vegetables, yogurt and cottage cheese.

I am amazed that you can name almost every vacuum made by simply knowing how they look and are designed and how impressive it is when we are out in a store and you can point them out to me.

I am amazed that you like the taste of my coffee, once it has cooled off.

I am amazed that you never give up when you want something. You are almost relentless in asking for it, even when the answer is no.

I am amazed that you are willing to share your toys, even if you don’t want to.

I am amazed at how much you love animals and are not afraid of them. I shouldn’t be amazed by this, because your mom loves animals too.

I am amazed that you are always willing to try and you don’t give up easily.

I am amazed that when someone doesn’t want to do something, you gently remind them to try.

I am amazed that you can watch ceiling fans and fidget spinners spin for hours and you love this. Who knew something so simple could bring such joy?

I am truly blessed that you are in my life, Tyson. You have taught me many things. Some I have learned by trial and error; in many ways, I have a ways to go. But you never give up on me. You bring such joy to my life. I cannot imagine my life without you in it.

Every condition and disorder you have been diagnosed with, one would be more than enough for anyone to handle, but you deal with five. So no matter how many times, I want to cry and feel sorry for what you have been dealt, I look at how resilient you are and I know that because you live with these, I do too. I’ve learned to look at life just a little bit differently and realize that although these disabilities may afford you some extra help, that they do not mean you can’t. You just do things differently.

I love you; I love you more; I love you the most; I love you forever! This is what we say to each other before bedtime. He repeats much of what he hears but will say I love you too, on his own.

*I wrote this for our grandson, Tyson. He is four years old. Someday he may be able to read it or have it read to him, but I want him to know that although we never expected to have a Special Needs grandson living with us and being a part of our everyday life, challenging us to think outside the box of “normal parenting” if there is such a thing, that without a doubt, he has opened my eyes to the world around me. He has taught me so much in these last four years, more than I could have ever learned in a book.

I am thankful to our Heavenly Father that he felt he could entrust Tyson to our care, along with his mom. And I pray daily that we utilize every opportunity to help him learn and thrive in the world we live in.

May you know that Jesus loves you~right where you are right now and always.

Blessings, Carlene

Family Time

This past week, we loaded up our Yukon and drove 989 miles in searing heat with no air, except for the wind whipping around in the truck with our windows down. As humid and hot as it was, and all the perspiring going on, we should have melted the pounds away.

When you travel with a child that has special needs and an adult with respiratory problems, you feel like you’re packing the entire house for a weekly excursion. Loading the truck with suitcases, a medicine bag for several people, mobility devices and a bag of toys/books to keep everyone satisfied….checking lists off twice, it’is not as easy as it sounds. It takes almost an hour to load everything and then you pray you didn’t forget anything.

Our family, except for our daughter and fiancee, secured in our seatbelts and car seats made the normal 15-18 hour trip in 21 hours. Longest 21 hours of my life so far.

I love the state of Florida and someday when I’m old and gray, I hope we can call Florida home again. Ok, I’m old and I do have some gray strands peeking through, but Tyson is doing so well in Ohio and is all set up with his therapists and specialists that moving is very daunting. I’m not sure I could talk his mom into leaving her friends in Ohio and I know I couldn’t handle being too far away from him or our other grandchildren.

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Tyson loved the pool and we tried to go every day while there. At first, he was hesitant, but once in, getting him out was almost impossible. His Uncle Mike made it fun, taught him to close his eyes and hold his nose to go under the water. He loved jumping from the steps with his swim vest on and spinning in the water. This was a great way to expend his energy before our nightly dinners and almost always ensured he would drift off to dreamland.

When your only living parent lives almost a thousand miles away, you cherish the time you have and if you are even a little bit emotional like me, find it hard to say goodbye. I kept my tears inside and thought about how blessed I am to still have our mother here and so very thankful to have spent the 7 days with her. Great memories were made and all of her neighbors doted and loved on Ty. Providing him with toys to use while there and yummy snacks any toddler would love.

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We visited a great Thai rolled ice cream shop in downtown St. Petersburg called Ice Burg. We watched as they made the specialty treats. It was worth the drive downtown just to try it out! Very filling for low prices.

We ventured to a fenced in play area near Gulfport beach in Pinellas County and Ty was able to access a small beach area with sand and shells. For the past few months all he has talked about was going to the beach and building sand castles but as it turned out, that was the only beach he would visit. He didn’t want anymore to do with beaches only the pool. Maybe one day he will relish the sand and surf.

You never realize how much you miss your mom’s home cooking until you are eating it. We ate out twice while there..the rest of the time was savoring the smells wafting in the air as she prepared meals. My mom is an amazing chef!

As we embark on the road trip home, I’m so very thankful to Jesus for keeping us safe. We’ve been on the road for over 8 hours now and thankful my husband and sweetheart is good at driving and navigation; he used to drive for a living.

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The biggest takeaway from this post. Enjoy the time you have with your family. Love one another, laugh and cherish each moment you are blessed to have.

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Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good.
Romans 12:9 NLT

May you know how much Jesus Loves You~right now wherever you are!

Blessings~Carlene

#HopeAlwaysHaveFaith

Making Memories & Learning

Philippians 4:13 New Living Translation (NLT)
13 For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.

 

Earlier today I realized as Tyson was dumping toy bins and playing, that in a week, he will be home all day long. And I started to panic, thinking about the messes and then someone reminded me that I need to look at things a little differently. Don’t look at it as just a mess, but making memories.  I know that’s how I should view it. It’s extremely difficult to remember that, all the time.

Tyson and Bee
Tyson playing with his musical bee

I started getting our learning materials in order so he can continue to expand and learn on concepts he is currently learning and maintaining some type of routine and structure so that when school starts back up in the fall, it won’t be so hard to get back into the swing of things. At speech therapy for the past several weeks, he is trying to learn the concepts “in” “out” “over” “under” “next to” “open” “close”. Asking where, what, and who questions are not as easy for Ty as we would hope, but each week he makes progress. Speaking the words are hit and miss. The word ‘in’ is easy. On and off are simple enough, because they are short syllable words. Last week, he finally could say the word open.  We have been working on the word open since he was 2 1/2. Using the sign with our hands as if we were opening a book and showing him what the ‘O’ sound looks like with our mouth.  What finally did it for him shows me and his speech therapist that all of our minds process words and sounds differently.  She had an ink pen and he was saying pen very well. She made the ‘O’ sound and then said pen-pointing to the pen. He finally got it and said ‘open’.  It took something so different for just that one word, but now he understands how to say it, what it means and the sign language for opening something. It’s been a long 11/2 years for him to understand.  Beginning and ending sounds are something he struggles with.  “V” comes out like “B”.

He fixates on two objects and will watch numerous YouTube videos of these objects. You will never guess in a million years so I will spare you the guessing game. #1-Vacuums #2-Ceiling Fans. Every time we go anywhere that has vacuum cleaners or ceiling fans, he wants to stop and look at them, check out all the details and if the ceiling fans are not turned on, he wants to know why.  I am not surprised by the ceiling fans. They spin and he loves anything that spins. Being obsessed with the vacuum cleaners has developed over time. He DOES NOT like when they are turned on. The sound is too loud and painful for him. He has noise canceling headphones that he wears when we have ours turned on at home, but he loves it so much when it is off, we literally have to pry it out of his hands. He will unwrap and rewrap the power cord as many times as we let him, sometimes for hours if we allowed it. We have learned when we are finished using the vacuum, it is put up right away, otherwise, a meltdown will occur and it may take hours before he is calm enough to talk to.  In the stores, we must avoid the vacuum cleaner displays or he cries and screams.  If they are unavoidable, we have learned the battle is not worth the outcome. We stroll down the aisle and let him see them, point out the colors, features and then we say goodbye.  I never thought in all my life, I would be talking to inanimate objects, but it makes him happy and keeps him calm.

When the weather is nice and not pouring rain, like it has done for the past several days, his mommy and her fiancée take him for walks in the neighborhood. He loves taking walks and playing outside. I miss being able to do this activity with him. I do have my walker with a seat on it, but it’s difficult to hold onto his harness and the walker at the same time. Somehow we will figure it out. Being outside, playing and walking, is not only healthy for him, but it helps to reduce the hyperactivity associated with the ADHD he deals with, along with the medications he is on. I hate the fact he has to be on medications, but for him to stay focused and not out of control, right now they are needed. I am very thankful for his AED medications. He hasn’t had a seizure for almost two weeks, which is great! Dealing with Epilepsy, I am learning is being ever vigilant because he has a mixture of different types of seizures and there is no trigger that we know of, at this time, so you never know when one will happen. AED is the abbreviation for anti-epileptic drugs. I often forget not everyone knows the terms or abbreviations I use.

Today was a good day for Tyson. He was excited when his bus picked him up this morning and played most of the afternoon, watched some videos and spun around until I was dizzy just watching him.

I know that we have to keep his mind entertained as well as having just good old-fashioned playtime.  Repetition is key for him learning and recalling things. He is very visually oriented and I have found a great site to get products from that will help him to learn in a fun way.  I love TheAutismHelper page on Teachers Pay Teachers. If you have Pre-K through 6th grade and love someone on the Autism Spectrum, I highly recommend checking out what she has to offer. There are many resources that I have purchased in the past, as well as some magnificent downloads for free.

I thank Jesus every day that he entrusted Tyson to our family and I pray daily that He will guide me and give me strength when it seems like too much to handle. I know that HE is my strength. Jesus will lead me and guide me, I just need to remember to listen and follow His lead.

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May you know how much Jesus Loves You~right where you are at this moment!

#HopeAlwaysHaveFaith

Blessings~Carlene

 

 

 

Blessed to be a Mom

Proverbs 6:20-23 The Message (MSG)

20-23 Good friend, follow your father’s good advice;
don’t wander off from your mother’s teachings.
Wrap yourself in them from head to foot;
wear them like a scarf around your neck.
Wherever you walk, they’ll guide you;
whenever you rest, they’ll guard you;
when you wake up, they’ll tell you what’s next.
For sound advice is a beacon,
good teaching is a light,
moral discipline is a life path.

 

Motherhood does not come with a manual, but a plethora of advice from those who have been in the trenches of raising children.  Some advice is not only helpful but lifesaving in moments of chaos and distress. Much of the advice is not helpful because it applies to certain children with special circumstances.  The best advice I ever received was when your child is happy or sad, mad or hurting, love them. Don’t be afraid that rocking them to sleep will spoil them. Children cannot begin to understand what love is if they don’t see it in their own lives. They can learn, but oh to be able to experience it first hand is so much better than being taught what love looks like.

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This beautiful woman is my mother.

My children, who are adults now, used to exasperate me when it came to school projects. I am sure many reading this can relate. They are given an assignment, in which a visual presentation must take place, along with a report or speech. Many times this counts for a large portion of their grade. Educators know that in order for them to complete these projects, they are given ample time to accomplish them. Several weeks time, usually. However, my children would always wait until the very last-minute to spring these projects on me ~ usually one to two days before they were due!  And as they feverishly rushed to finish them, I would comment on how lucky they were to live in this day and age.

“Google” in my day meant making a trip to the library, searching the card catalog for reference materials and books to read and research. We didn’t have the luxury of the internet or typewriters/word processors that had self correction included. If we made a mistake, we had to start over. Long before “white out” was invented or “correction tape” was available. And many times you could tell by the details, the projects were rushed. Long nights of gluing and pasting pictures cut out of magazines or printed materials, with the hopes they would pass their class. Loving them also meant that if they didn’t complete it to the teacher’s satisfaction, it was on them. Learning to realize that there was a solution always in front of them, using their time wisely and not waiting.

It would have been easy for me to do their homework, but they wouldn’t have learned anything by doing that. Life is full of lessons.  Working on school projects and homework helps to prepare them for the real world with a real job and performing many tasks that may seem mundane, but so important.

I wish I would have taught them about why a budget is so very important. If they had money to spend, as a child, the thought of saving it was lost on them until they saw something they wanted and didn’t have the funds to get it and I was a “mean” mom. If they didn’t need it, chances are they weren’t getting it without working for it. I believe it’s important for children to understand that not everything in life is free. Earning funds to pay for something teaches the value of hard work and feeling accomplished in by the success of reaching a goal. Goals are important in life. Creating plans on how to accomplish goals takes perseverance and a willingness to “get it done” attitude. Lofty goals can be accomplished, but you have to be willing to put the work in to get to where you want to be. And there is nothing that can stop you, except the limits you place on yourself.  There is still a sign, hanging in our home that reads “Just because something is difficult, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try, it means you should just try harder.”  I firmly believe that. I also believe that “giving up is not an option”. Something my parents taught me from a young age.

Mother's Poem

I have tried my best to model love and kindness to my children. To show them that even though they may not have everything they want, they have everything they need. To teach them that they need to exhibit kindness to others and stand up for the downtrodden. Be a friend, offer a hand up, listen, don’t judge someone by their appearance or circumstance. Be thankful for all you have. And if you want more than you have, do what you need to do to make it a reality.

I never had to wonder if my mom loved me. I was lucky. I am still blessed. I made many choices my mother did not agree with and I know many times she was disappointed, but never once did I have to wonder if she loved me. Never. I pray that my children will always be able to say that with confidence and mean it.

I am not blind to the fact that there are many people in this world that did not have a mother that loved unconditionally or even cared what was happening in their lives. And that breaks my heart. My response to those who haven’t had a  life where they had a mom or had a mother that loved them in spite of their faults, remember this no matter the type of parent she was-she loved you enough to give you life. And I imagine that may seem a cliché thing to say, but it is a fact. If you are reading this, then at some point, a woman decided you were worth it. Even if you were given up at birth, you were worth the love of being allowed to be born. Jesus will always love you, even when you feel unworthy of love.

I also think of the women that don’t have children, the ones that would give anything to have a child, to hear the words “I love you mommy.” And, I don’t know why God allows some women to have children that aren’t wanted and those who want them, for whatever reason, can’t conceive. But know this, there are many motherless children in the world that need your love. If you have a deep need to be a mom, and can’t do it naturally, please look into adopting or fostering a child. God will always make a way.

If you have played a role in a child’s life, through mentoring, teaching and making them feel special, regardless if you are their mom or not, you have shown love.

It is my prayer that if you are mother that you have a very blessed Mother’s Day this weekend. If you have lost a child, please accept my condolences. I too have a child in Heaven and I think about her every single day. One day we will be reunited.

May you know how much Jesus Loves You~every single moment of every day!

#HopeAlwaysHaveFaith

Blessings~Carlene